


Matchmaker, Matchmaker

by mattygroves



Category: Frasier (TV), Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Finally the Fraiser AU you've all been waiting for!, M/M, Misunderstandings, Oblivious Rodney
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-01
Updated: 2017-01-01
Packaged: 2018-09-13 20:54:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,912
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9141817
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mattygroves/pseuds/mattygroves
Summary: It was a nice smile; a little sarcastic, a little sweet. Plus he probably looked good under that suit, Rodney thought, giving him the once over. John’s smile faltered slightly then seemed to get brighter. Yes, this was the perfect man to set Jeannie up with.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I watched a queerbaiting episode of Frasier and had to fix it. A few lines borrowed from Frasier episode 2.3. *Shrugs*

“This concludes our test of the emergency broadcasting system. You’re listening to KATL, Atlantis Radio Seattle. I’m Dr. Rodney McKay, and I’ll be back to answer your physics questions after a brief word from our sponsors.

Teyla, Rodney’s producer in the next booth, gave him the sign that he was off the air. His headphones fell askew as he cradled his head in his hands.

“Rodney, you look unwell,” Teyla’s concerned voice came through the earpiece.

“I’m fine. I was just up half the night with Jeannie bemoaning our miserable love lives over half a bottle of Grey Goose.”

“I thought Jeannie was dating that English Professor from her university,” Teyla said, her kind voice only betrayed slightly by the quirk of her mouth.

“Don’t even get me started on the English Professor,” Rodney said darkly.

There was a slight knock on the door, and a thick thatch of hair poked its way in. Rodney resisted the urge to run his fingers through his own thinning hair to puff it up a bit. The woman at the salon had given him pomade, but it was an uphill battle.

“I’m John Sheppard, the new station manager,” the hair said, extending his hand.

“Of course,” Rodney slapped his forehead and instantly regretted it. “Dr. Rodney McKay. I’m so sorry I missed the meeting this morning. I slept right though it.”

“I slept through it, too, and I was there,” John smiled.

It was a nice smile; a little sarcastic, a little sweet. Plus he probably looked good under that suit, Rodney thought, giving him the once over. John’s smile faltered slightly then seemed to get brighter. Yes, this was the perfect man to set Jeannie up with.

“That’s a nice tie, Rodney,” John said. “Silk?”

“What? Oh, yes. How good of you to notice. I picked it up on Madison Avenue a few years ago,” Rodney absently smoothed his tie with a pleased smile.

“I just came from New York. Kicked around at NPR for awhile, but I was ready for a change when KATL called.”

“Say,” Rodney said, not one for smooth transitions, “I hope you won’t think it’s too forward of me, but would you like to have dinner tonight? At my place.”

John raised an eyebrow, considering. “Why not?”

“Excellent,” Rodney grinned smugly. Jeannie was going to love this guy and Rodney was going to be named brother of year.

***

“Trust me Jeannie, wear the red dress,” Rodney told his sister on the phone as he maneuvered his cart through the specialty grocery store he frequented. “This guy is incredibly hot.”

“Something you want to tell me, Mer?”

“Please don’t call me that tonight. And no, there’s nothing I want to tell you, unless you think a perfectly straight man can’t appreciate another man’s beauty on an aesthetic level. _What_?”

The last part was directed at an older woman giving him the stink eye. It was possible Rodney was talking too loudly into his cellphone.

“Please don’t get banned from another grocery store, Mer. You know how cranky you get when you don’t have access to Camembert. And do you have any idea how uncomfortable a strapless bra is? Especially when you’ve got giant bahonkas like me—”

“Oh my god, I am your _brother_ , I do not need to hear about your giant breasts. _What_?”

The same woman was still staring at him in disgust.

“Look, Jeannie, I’ve got to go, I hope you like pot roast.”

“I’m a vegetarian.”

“Still? I thought you’d be over that since you and what’s his face broke up.”

“His name is Kaleb and I hate you. See you tonight.”

She hung up before he could say goodbye. Rodney got the pot roast anyway, along with organic carrots and potatoes. At the last minute he picked up a lentil dish from the Deli section that he could easily reheat for Jeannie.

***

“You’re not vegetarian, are you?” Rodney asked as soon he opened the door.

“No?”

“Oh thank god, come in.”

John looked a little wary, but he entered Rodney’s spacious modern apartment anyway.

“Nice place. That’s quite a view.”

“It’s even better from the bedroom,” Rodney said proudly.

“If you like heights so much, I should take you up in my plane. It’s just a Cessna, but—”

“A plane? God, no,” Rodney said firmly, before realizing that might have been rude. No need to offend the guy before he’s even had a chance to meet Jeannie. “I mean, um, maybe?”

To his surprise, John laughed. Really laughed. The guy should be embarrassed about a laugh like that.

“I can be very convincing, Rodney,” he said when he had finally calmed down. “I’ll bet I’ll have you up in my little puddlejumper by the end of the month.”

Rodney didn’t have a response to that, but he blushed anyway.

“I should check the roast,” he disappeared into the kitchen. John followed him.

“I brought some wine. A Sangiovese from this vineyard I like in the Bay Area. It was founded by the same guys who invented the Jacuzzi. That was their family name.”

“Oh, excellent. I love Jacuzzis, ” Rodney said. “Let’s open it right away.”

“I saw the table was set for four out there, who else are you expecting?”

“My sister Jeannie—you’ll love her—and Teyla, my producer. You probably met her at work today.”

“Yeah, she was at the meeting,” John smirked. “The _mandatory_ meeting.”

“Well, excuse me, I’m a very busy man. In addition to a research fellowship at the U-Dub, I consult with a number of tech companies, not to mention the classified government contracts that I can’t even tell you about because, hello, _classified_!”

“Rodney,” John said softly, placing a hand on his shoulder. “I’m just giving you a hard time. I don’t care about the meeting.”

“Oh, well, good.”

“Good,” John said, letting his hand brush down Rodney’s arm.

Rodney’s eyes were following the trail of John’s hand when the doorbell rang and he nearly jumped out of his skin.

***

As they lingered over a post-prandial cognac, Rodney was still trying to figure out how to get John and Jeannie together. Their interaction so far was polite, but John seemed more interested in talking to Rodney. It was strange. And Jeannie didn’t seem that interested in John either. Rodney probably should have waited longer after Jeannie’s breakup with Kaleb to set her up.

“This was very nice, Rodney, thank you for dinner,” Teyla said. “Kanaan was sorry he couldn’t make it, but Torren is teething and it seemed cruel to subject a sitter to that.”

“So you won the coin toss?” Jeannie grinned.

“I gave birth to Torren. It seemed only fair to let Kanaan experience this joy of parenthood,” Teyla smiled serenely. “And in truth, Kanaan is very shy.”

Rodney was making surreptitious eye movements at Jeannie, hoping to convey that she should start taking the plates to the kitchen and invite John to help her.

“Oh,” said Jeannie, “Let me get these plates. John, would you like to help me in the kitchen?”

Huh. Rodney was surprised that worked.

“Of course,” John said.

“No Jeannie, let me,” Teyla scooted back her chair. “You’ve been on your feet teaching all day. I just sit in a chair and make faces at Rodney through the glass. Don’t tell my boss, though.” She winked at John, who laughed.

“What was that?” Rodney asked when John and Teyla were safely in the kitchen. “Are you even trying?”

“I don’t think there’s a spark between John and me. I appreciate that you tried, Mer, but I really just want to get out this strapless bra and eat a tub of Ben and Jerry’s tonight. Sorry.”

Rodney sighed. “No, of course. I probably shouldn’t have been so gung-ho about this. You’re fresh off a break-up, it was too soon.”

Jeannie’s phone buzzed across the room and she got up to check it. “Um, Mer, don’t be mad, but it’s Kaleb. He wants to get coffee and talk.”

“Are you going to go?”

“I think so.”

Teyla popped her head out the kitchen. “Rodney, why don’t you show John the view from the balcony?”

“What? Oh, sure. Come on.”

John was holding two more glasses of wine and looking like sex. Rodney couldn’t figure why he was still having thoughts like that pop into his head. Obviously his attempt at matchmaking had failed, so he didn’t have to consider whether John was attractive to Jeannie, or any woman, anymore. He could just go back to his normal thoughts about women, and the lack thereof, in his life.

He followed John onto the balcony.

“Jeannie, I hope you won’t be too disappointed, but I don’t think John is the one for you,” Teyla said when they’d closed the balcony door.

“Oh, yeah, I’d already figured that out. It’s too soon after the break up, and Kaleb and I still need to talk about stuff—” Jeannie suddenly noticed the gleam in Teyla’s eye—“What information are you hiding, Teyla? Spill.”

Teyla gave one of her rare laughs. “John just confided in me that he’s wary of dating someone he works with.”

“Did he come on to you? After all that talk about Kanaan and Torren? Gross.”

“You misunderstand me. John is wary about dating someone he works with, but he finds Rodney very interesting, nonetheless. I believe the term he used was ‘irresistible.’”

“Rodney? My brother, Rodney?”

“Indeed.”

“Oh, that’s good, trust Rodney to have the world’s worst gaydar. Poor John, though. I have to tell Mer before he breaks the guy’s heart or something.”

“Do you want me to tell him?”

“Thank you, but I should do it.”

***

Teyla said her goodbyes and stepped into the elevator, but Jeannie grabbed Rodney for a private chat in the hallway before taking off to see Kaleb.

“So, Mer, I think we’ve established that John and I aren’t interested in each other.”

“Yes, did you drag me into the hallway to state the obvious? I have a guest waiting, in case you’ve forgotten.”

“I didn’t forget. John _is_ interested in somebody here tonight though.”

“Teyla? She’s practically married.”

“Not Teyla,” Jeannie gave him a level look. Rodney did some mental math.

Oh. _Oh_. Hm.

“Yes,” Jeannie said.

***

John was sprawled comfortably on Rodney’s couch when he reentered the apartment. He really was ridiculously attractive, if you were into that sort of thing, man, penis. _Get a grip_ , Rodney told himself.

“I’m glad we got some one-on-one,” John said easily.

“Oh, yes, um,” Rodney gave a spectacular display of the loquacity for which he was known in the science community.

“You’re kind of cute when you’re nervous.”

“I must be adorable right now, then,” Rodney said, skirting around the room, until his hands gripped the back of his Eames lounge chair.

“Yeah,” John said, standing up and moving towards him.

Rodney told himself it was purely scientific interest that kept him rooted in one spot as John approached. Then John was right in his space, all rolled up sleeves and muscular forearms. Apparently he had ditched his suit jacket while Rodney was talking to Jeannie.

“I’m not gay,” Rodney said, louder than he meant to. John looked taken aback for a moment, but he didn’t move away.

“You sure about that?” he said, his voice lightly teasing.

Rodney swallowed hard. “Um. No.”

“I can work with that,” John said, kissing him.

After only a moment, Rodney was kissing back.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading and happy new year! One of my goals for 2017 was to write longer fic, so I'm slipping this shortie in right before the deadline :)


End file.
